I still remember my very first Tantra workshop. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. All I knew was that my sex life sucked and that I needed to try something new. Tantra held no promises but I knew that it had something to do with extraordinary sexual experiences. And at that stage I was desperate enough to try anything.
Not long before that I was rushed to an emergency room due to extreme pain caused by intercourse. While my life was flashing before my eyes, I kept wondering whether I was dying or whether I’d done an irreparable damage to my pelvis. The physical pain was excruciating. But still nothing when compared to the wounds in my heart and soul.
Because you see, for many years prior, I was having conventional sex. And it often hurt. But what hurt even more was the depth of disconnect that I was experiencing between myself and my lover. As I watched him focus completely on pounding inside of me, I often wondered, where he’d gone. It felt like he’d disappeared to some kind of distant world of sexual pleasure that I had no access to. That I was never invited to.
To me, sex felt empty. A physical meeting of two sets of genitals that I was unable to derive any pleasure or satisfaction from. Unlike my partners, who seemed quite content, while falling asleep straight after. Something was missing but I had no idea what.
This continued for many years… until I came across Tantra. And once I started studying its philosophy, practices and rituals, there was no coming back for me. I finally found all the answers to my questions. I finally understood why sex felt so empty and uncomfortable before. And I finally learned how to change that.
So today I invite you to revisit the most fundamental principles of Tantra. And how they apply in the bedroom.
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