How to Have a Cervical Orgasm

How to Have a Cervical Orgasm

Each time I mention cervical orgasms during public talks and interviews, I get a lot of surprised looks and questions. This keeps reminding me of how very few people are actually aware of what cervical orgasms are.

 

On one hand, this makes me sad because cervical orgasms are so incredibly delicious and every single woman should be experiencing them on a regular basis. But on the other hand, I myself didn’t learn about their existence until I began researching and exploring all sexual books, articles, programs, courses and workshops I could get my hands on back at the beginning of my tantric path.

 

So, what’s all the fuss about?

 

All orgasms are wonderful and delightful and I’m not in any way attempting to grade or classify them here. But in my own personal experience, there is something deeply potent, beautiful and out-of-this world about cervical orgasms. I like to refer to them as the Holy Grail of all female orgasms because of that depth of pleasure and bliss they offer. And in this article, I’m going to not only talk about the art of having one, but also about giving one to your partner if you don’t happen to own a cervix yourself.

 

Why are cervical orgasms so amazing?

 

Cervix is located at the back wall of the vaginal canal and it is the entrance to the womb. When touched and massaged, it feels like the tip of the nose. Because of its specific anatomy and biology, when stimulated, cervix can provide a woman with very different and distinct kind of pleasure and sensations, as compared to the externally located and much more familiar clitoris.

 

Cervix can be stimulated with a penis, with a dildo or with a finger (except for some women who have fairly long vaginal canals and can’t reach it with fingers). When stimulated, cervix produces blissful pleasure that feels deep, peacefully grounding and expansive. The sensations seem to be flowing outward in the body in a very profound way, like waves of the ocean.

 

The experience can put a woman in a state of ecstatic trance not just for a few seconds but for much, much longer.

 

Why don’t all women have cervical orgasms?

 

Most women have experienced years of aggressive, mechanical, disconnected, porn-inspired sex. The poor cervix is a highly sensitive creature which requires an appropriate level of pressure, speed and intensity of stimulation. However, if it’s been pounded for years without an appropriate level of appreciation and care, it will over time lose its pleasure potential and it will become numb.

 

What to do if your cervix is numb?

 

The good news is that any woman can re-sensitize her cervix. With enough time and patience, that precious sensitivity of all the nerve endings can be re-claimed and cultivated.

 

First of all, see if you can find your cervix using your fingers. Once you locate it, massage it gently, paying attention to any sensations you experience there. This can take some time and a few tries so don’t get discouraged if you can’t feel anything straight away.

 

An amazing tool for re-sensitizing the cervix is a rose quartz crystal wand and I would recommend it to any lady who is committed to re-claiming the full potential of her orgasmic cervix. I still use my pleasure wand to keep my cervix happy and activated and I consider my wand to be one of my most prized possessions.

 

Tip for the gentlemen

 

During intercourse, apart from the more familiar in-and-out movement, try also slowly sliding your penis deep inside the vagina and then use an up-and-down grinding motion, allowing the head of the penis to stroke and massage the cervix. This can take a while so don’t give up after 30 seconds!

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10 Unusual Ways to Masturbate

10 Unusual Ways to Masturbate

The International Masturbation Month is in full swing and I think that it’s time to play with some new, fun ideas. I am fond of giving my clients homework (or is it home-play?…) and I hope that you’ll be tempted to try at least a few of these scenarios.

 

Most people I speak to always masturbate the same way.

 

We often form self-touch habits early in life and then keep stroking ourselves in fairly routine ways for years. How about you? Do you still touch yourself the same way you did 10-15 years ago?

 

This can be problematic because you can end up wiring your nervous system to respond to particular kind of stimulation, which can then unfortunately limit your sexual potential. So here are a few interesting ways to shake up your self-pleasure routine!

 

1/ Bath tub

Fill the tub with warm water and add Epson salts, essential oils, bubble bath, or anything else you like. Once you get in, warm water will deeply relax your entire body plus it will caress and stimulate your skin, adding an extra level of sensation to your experience. Touching and stroking yourself in that state will take you to a whole new level of delish!

 

2/ Mirror

Use a full-length mirror or a small hand-held mirror placed in front of genitals (or both!). This will allow you to see what you look like in arousal plus how your body is responding to your self-stimulation. Most people have never seen themselves when turned on and have no idea how hot they look!

 

3/ Vibrator on the body

Stimulating different parts of your body with a vibrator can be a lot of fun! Most people only use vibrators on their genitalia but using them to stimulate others body parts can be extremely pleasurable and arousing. For example, applying a vibrating toy to your chest will not only provide lovely stimulation there, it’ll also help your body send the arousal upwards, helping your sexual energy spread and expand.

 

4/ Vibrator on the anus

One of my teachers, Joseph Kramer, Ph.D., claims that stimulating the anal opening with a vibrator can induce trance-like states of bliss. How about testing this for yourself?

 

5/ External/internal anal massage

Speaking of the anus – when was the last time you gave yourself an anal massage? Make sure to use plenty of lubrication as the anus doesn’t produce any of its own. And be gentle with yourself – massage the anus externally in any way that feels delicious to you. And if you’re adventurous, you can venture inside. But remember – anal stimulation should never hurt. If it does, slow down, add more lube and be much, much gentler!

 

6/ Hands-free

Using hands to stroke ourselves can create tension in the body and can reduce your pleasure.

This is why going hands-free can be a lot of fun! But it requires a bit of preparation. If you’re a woman, you can attach a vibrator to a nightstand or a table and move your body on it in any way that feels good.

If you’re a man, you can attach a Fleshlight (or a similar toy) on an appropriate height that will allow you to thrust into it easily. If you don’t own a vagina-shaped toy, you can use a plastic bag with some lubricant in it. Sticky-tape it to any surface and thrust away!

 

7/ Use air

Use a fan or a fan-heater to stimulate your genital area with either cool or warm air. This can be extremely arousing but make sure to adjust the air temperature so it’s not too hot or not too cold!

 

8/ Water play

Shower heads can be absolutely exquisite as a source of sexual pleasure. If you can, adjust the water pressure to your liking and let warm water stroke, caress and massage your intimate bits. Because the sensations will be gentler than direct hand touch, this will provide a lot of teasing before you come!

 

9/ Dancing

Instead of masturbating on your bed, stand up, put lively music on and stroke yourself while dancing. Don’t think about how to move – nobody’s watching you anyways! You don’t have to show off any sexy dance moves. Instead, listen to your body and move in any way your body wants to move. You can shake, jump, bounce, stretch or flow. Whatever you do, stay connected to your arousal and your pleasure!

 

10/ Make a video

As you begin your masturbation session, set up the camera in your phone and hit “Record”. Do a show, enjoy yourself but don’t rush it! Take your time and slowly explore your eroticism in front of the camera. Nobody else needs to ever watch it (unless you show them). And the awareness of being recorded will give you a sense of being witnessed, which can be a huge turn-on for many!

 

 

But wait – that’s not the end! If you enjoyed this list, you’re going to LOVE my Masturbation Coaching online course. It’s a 7-week journey for both men and women who want to expand their sexual and orgasmic potential through a masterful self-touch. This program is full to the brim of tips, techniques and practices that will train your body to open up erotically and experience completely new types of orgasm!

 

To celebrate the Masturbation Month, the entire course is available at 50% off with coupon code ‘SelfLove’.

Enrol today and begin your journey towards the fullness of your sexual, erotic and orgasmic potential!

LEARN MORE

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How to Breathe Yourself to Orgasm

How to Breathe Yourself to Orgasm

I have orgasmed in public many times before.

 

(I guess that’s a phrase you don’t hear very often!). It has happened mainly with me as a participant during workshops, Tantra events and different sexuality courses. But more recently, these public O’s have taken on a new dimension for me…

 

I’ve been breathing myself to orgasm as a facilitator, in front of all participants – at first accidentally and then, on purpose. (If you’re wondering how it’s possible to breathe yourself to orgasm accidentally, ask me – funny story…)

 

I’ve been running more and more of my own workshops and talks recently. Doing this allows me an amazing freedom as I can teach and conduct my events exactly how I want to. Things don’t always go to plan, as different participants bring their own degree of familiarity with the topic and their own set of questions…

 

But mostly my events attract people who are completely new to Tantra and sacred sexuality.

 

Most of them have never experienced the fullness of their orgasmic power. More than that – they’re not even aware of what their bodies are capable of in the realm of pleasure and sexual bliss!

 

When I describe orgasmic pleasure rippling and vibrating like waves through the entire body, when I talk about circulating energy between partners and merging into one being with your lover, when I describe a state where you don’t know any more whether it’s your orgasm or theirs, eyes widen and jaws drop.

 

Some of the workshops include a presentation of the full-body orgasm and sometimes a presentation is requested.

 

And as I sit there before my audience, taking myself into a deep state of orgasmic activation, within a minute or two, my body starts to shake, my eyes roll backwards and my deep erotic moans dominate a completely quiet room. My whole body feels electric, every cell of my being is vibrating and full-body pleasure keeps flooding my system.

 

When I finally open my eyes, the facial expressions around me are varied – from fascination and joy to shock and utter surprise.

 

There are a few things I love about this practical demo…

 

First of all, this challenges popular beliefs and ideas about achieving orgasm. Second of all, it gives the attendees practical tools to do the exact same thing themselves. And thirdly, there’s a sort of transmission happening there where some of the people in the audience become orgasmically activated just from watching me.

 

Because the truth is that anybody can do it!

 

I don’t have a special body with some supernatural powers. Instead, I have learned how to connect to my deep orgasmic potential and how to activate my body through breath and surrender. And if you’d like to do the same, you can learn more in my Orgasmic Empowerment course for women. As a part of my Christmas Special, I’m offering the entire 7-week program at a 50% discount until 8 December with code: xmas50.

 

I truly believe that there’s a deep power hidden within a person who has fully activated and cultivated their erotic energy. I absolutely know that expanded, deeply ecstatic and profoundly nurturing orgasms are our birthright. And I believe that we can use our full-body orgasms for more pleasure, more connection and to manifest amazing things into our lives.

 

We just need to know how…

 

Orgasmic Empowerment for Women is a 7-week online journey that will take you from where you are now sexually to where you want to be and beyond! You will learn, you will practice, you will explore and you will transform. This program is very practical and each week you’ll be working with new techniques and tools of sexual healing and empowerment.

At the end of this path, you’ll come out feeling like a new, better, more sensual version of yourself. You will build confidence, attraction and charisma in your body. You will cultivate your sexual force and power, making you irresistible to men, whether you’re single and looking for a partner or whether you’ve been in a relationship for years and want to create more juice, pleasure and fun at home!

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How to Amp Up Your Sexy

How to Amp Up Your Sexy

When I first heard of a practice called ‘Golden Chalice’, it seduced me with both the experience it was promising me and with its name. Doesn’t it sound so lush, so feminine – Golden Chalice… Like a female version of ‘Holy Grail’!

 

This technique is designed to awaken your sexual charisma and to spread it out through your entire body until it permeates every cell of your system and radiates from every inch of your skin. It moves your arousal energy from your deep core and then out through the rest of your being until you’re feeling that vibrant erotic charge flowing through you freely.

 

This creates a sense of magnetic charisma in your body and gives you a seductive quality that people around you notice and react to.

 

It activates you in a deeply primal, grounded, yet sublime way. It gives your energy a mysterious vibe that others can’t usually understand, and find hard to resist.

 

So, as you’re probably suspecting, I immediately started using Golden Chalice in my daily life. I would practice it before going on dates, when going to meetings and even walking down the street. I’ve always loved noticing how it makes me feel, how it uplifts me and makes the world around me shine.

 

Depending on the day, I would get more or less intense results with it. Sometimes it would feel like it was making barely any difference and on other days I would feel like my body was on some kind of erotic high! I guess all depends on how much my body wants to play and how much energy I have available that day…

 

Golden Chalice was designed for women but men can also successfully play with it.

 

In order to experience it for yourself, sit down comfortably with your spine straight, without leaning back on anything. You’re going to need a bit of a flexibility of movement here.

 

Gently deepen your breathing and bring your attention down to your pelvic bowl. Now, very subtly, with awareness, start slowly moving your pelvis in a circular motion – as if it was a glass of exquisite cognac that you were swirling around. The movement doesn’t need to be large or fast, in fact, it should be almost imperceptible to an outsider.

 

As you’re doing that, imagine that the erotic juices in your pelvis are waking up and flowing around your pelvis, following your movement. Give yourself a few moments to really experience this movement. Make sure that your genital area is relaxed, make sure that you can really feel and experience the deliciousness of this delightful energy circling around.

 

And now imagine that the effervescent essence of this ‘liquid’ is starting to gently rise through your body. As you’re moving and swirling it, that erotic energy is beginning to slowly vaporize and move like delicious sparkly cloud through your entire system. Give yourself some time to fully delight in this experience, to savour it, to absorb it…

 

Notice how it makes you feel, notice the sensations in your body, notice how this affects the quality of your energy.

 

And now go outside and carry that energy with you. Pay attention to the way it affects your interactions with the world and give yourself a full permission to feel delicious!

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What’s Inside a Sex Therapist’s Naughty Drawer

What’s Inside a Sex Therapist’s Naughty Drawer

Have you ever wondered what’s inside a sex therapist’s naughty drawer?…

Every time I mention my naughty drawer to someone, I need to explain that it’s not a standard kind of a drawer. In fact, its contents are quite different from what a regular person would consider a normal or usual set of sex props. And it’s not because I’m a particularly kinky person – I love kink but I don’t engage in it very often. And yet, some of the toys I play with might surprise and confuse an innocent witness…

 

So, let’s take a look!

 

1. Jade egg

My Jade Egg is the oldest item in this collection. It’s been with me for about 5 years and I’m extremely fond of it. It’s been a tool of sexual healing and reclaiming a deep sensitivity inside of my vagina.

A lot can be done with a jade egg, including all sort of vaginal exercises but I really like to simply sleep with it. I insert it as I get to bed and allow it to do its magic while I sleep. As I move in my sleep, the egg is moving with me, massaging and caressing all the areas inside of my vaginal canal that benefit from a regular touch.

 

2. Rose quartz eggs

These three beauties are much newer and come in different sizes, allowing for different levels of pressure and weight inside of me.

 

3. Tachyon balls

If I understand well, Tachyon products do not come from Earth but are artificially made. These products are imbued with Tachyon energy which harmonises and neutralises harmful energies.

But apart from their vibrational qualities, they’re very yummy to play with!

I like to put them inside during a self-pleasuring session and squeeze my pelvic floor around them for extra delish sensations!

 

4. Rose quartz pleasure wand

Another one of my prized possessions! It can be used in a variety of ways to thrust, massage and stimulate the vaginal canal.

But it’s hard to get a good grip on the wand once it’s inside due to its shape and smoothness.

So instead of creating a lot of movement and sensation, I prefer to insert it all the way in so that’s touching my cervix. Once there, I bring a lot of awareness to my cervix and to the vaginal walls that are in contact with the wand. I can spend quite a considerable amount of time in complete stillness, enjoying the rippling, expansive pleasure emanating from my vagina.

Optionally, I can gently tap on the wand with my fingers to create extra sensations.

At times, I’ll also add external stimulation to create a blended orgasm.

 

5. Black obsidian pleasure wand

This wand is a little smaller than number 4. but it has a different energy to it. Black obsidian has a denser, more grounded energy and creates a different experience for Alice (that’s what I named my pussy).

 

6. Rechargeable vibrator

This little gem is pretty, small, handy and rechargeable. Easy to play with and even travel with!

I love how much pleasure it can give me but I usually don’t introduce it into my solo play until I’m well aroused and ready. It can take me into a climax within a few minutes so I’m careful with it and use it to tease myself for a while.

Word of caution: vibrators are great but can de-sensitize your intimate area. Make sure to only use it from time to time so that your precious pearl can receive plenty of gentler – hand stimulation as well!

 

7. Pleasure wand

This one is a serious mama-wand! It’s not only much bigger than number 6., it’s also much more powerful. It has about 30 different settings and a potential for a lot of fun.

But I NEVER use it on my genitals without a barrier of fabric – it’s way too powerful for nude Alice.

However, its strength and versatility make it perfect for other body parts…

Plus, if my rechargeable vibrator runs out of charge half-way through, I can always reach for the mama-wand!

 

8. Anal stimulator

There aren’t a lot of silicone items in my drawer but I got this nifty little toy because it vibrates. And according to Joseph Kramer, Ph.D., vibrations on the anus can induce trance-like state of bliss.

And oh boy, is he right!

 

I hope that this quick visit to my naughty drawer provided you with some insight and inspiration. Or at least a little chuckle… Let me know if it did and next time I might show you my kinky drawer!

 

And if you’re curious about using your self-pleasuring practice consciously to expand your erotic potential, have a look at the Masturbation Coaching online course. It’s an amazing resource that’ll show you how to infuse your self-touch practice with much more depth, pleasure and bliss!

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How to Lose Yourself in a Tantric Orgasm

How to Lose Yourself in a Tantric Orgasm

‘Orgasm is a state of being that arises naturally when we are more relaxed in sex’ – Diana Richardson

 

This quote from one of my early teachers beautifully and simply captures the essence of tantric sex. Yet at the same time, its deep wisdom seems counterintuitive to the way we usually experience climax in the bedroom. When you think back to your typical orgasmic experience, you’ll probably notice that it tends to be an experience full of tension – muscles of your legs and pelvis are contracting and your breath becomes shorter and is often held. So why is Diana Richardson talking about being more relaxed in sex?

 

This used to really confuse me until I started training my body using tantric tools and practices. And after a while, what seemed to be a one and only way to experience sex and orgasm (tension, contraction, short breath, …) turned out to be just one of the ways to experience my eroticism.

 

These other ways led me down the path of not only becoming multi-orgasmic, but also of expanding my orgasms into a full-body, toe-curling, awe-inspiring experiences of expanded bliss…

 

I included my absolutely favourite tantric techniques in the Orgasmic Empowerment online course for Women. But more about that later as I currently have a very special Women’s Day deal on offer!

And I want to stress that there’s no judgement here about the more traditional tension-based approaches to sex. You should do whatever works for you and whatever you enjoy! I’m simply stressing that there are also other ways that might work better for you.

 

And this is significant because the amount of frustration around sex and orgasm in our society is truly mind blowing.

 

We often resign ourselves to infrequent, mediocre, painful or non-existent sex life because we lack basic understanding about how sex and sexual energy work. Even if a couple enjoys a juicy and frequent sex life at the beginning of their relationship, things usually change down the track and excitement morphs into disappointment or boredom.

 

An unhealthy routine develops, where men seek their own pleasure by penetrating woman’s body to achieve ejaculation. The amount of time required in such encounters is mostly not enough to arouse the woman sufficiently so that her sexual energy can start flowing equally abundantly. Women in such relationships feel used, lonely or purely disinterested in sex as their sexual frustration grows. Most men admit that this state of things is not truly satisfying to them either but they don’t know what to do about it.

 

There are also more considerate lovers who want to make sure that their female partner orgasms first by clitoral stimulation. But putting such pressure on a woman usually places her in a place where she feels guilty about taking too much time and becomes way too tense to achieve a true, deep ecstasy.

 

According to Tantra, we got it all wrong.

 

The basic understanding of male-female polarity suggests that male energy is like fire – heats up very quickly and quickly goes out. While female energy is like water – takes a longer time to warm up but also stays warm longer. This simple picture illustrates a very important point – we cannot force our bodies into being something that we are not and by not acknowledging our true nature, we remain empty and unsatisfied. It is often not in woman’s nature to heat up quickly and she usually doesn’t. Her nature is to create a beautifully relaxed, serene and sensitive environment for a man to enter which then allows him to also slow down, relax and last long enough to achieve a deeply satisfying and intense orgasm. Both can then join in a rich ecstasy, rooted in body awareness and deep relaxation.

 

We all have the inner ability to experience deep, long-lasting, spiritually enlightening orgasms.

 

But we lack basic education and awareness of the way our bodies work. A first, a very important step is to relax into our bodies and to develop a calm awareness of our sensations. We cannot experience mind blowing orgasms if we’re not truly connected to our bodies and if we don’t really know them. We need to take the time to learn what our bodies truly love and appreciate, what kind of touch arouses us, what kind of strokes give us pleasure.

 

Another important point is developing a loving awareness of ourselves. So many people (particularly women) suffer from poor body image, it’s no wonder we don’t like our bodies and try to disconnect from them as much as we can. As a regular practice, stand in front of a large mirror naked and look at your own body with admiration. This body carried you through so many years of ups and downs, it provided you with so much pleasure and served you well your entire life. Each mark or scar is a reminder of your body’s strength and survival abilities. Embrace yourself lovingly, your body is beautiful and it craves your love!

 

Whenever you lie down at night, practice a gentle, relaxed awareness for 10-15 minutes or as much time as you have. Lie down on your back with your spine straight, your feet more than hip-width apart and arms relaxed at your sides, palms up. Relax your entire body and allow your awareness to travel up and down your spine, becoming conscious of your body, particularly your heart area and your genitals.

 

Allow your awareness to penetrate your body so deep that you can feel your energy tingling in your organs as your body relaxes.

 

If you find it hard to become aware of your body part, place your hands on it to bring more energy there. And just rest with your body, connect to it, allow it to flood your awareness until you’re completely submerged in it. This deep awareness of your body is a first step in becoming more orgasmic. So practice it often and see your body as a lovable, beautiful creation. It will then provide you with as much pleasure as you can handle!

 

And if you’d love to learn all my favourite, more advanced techniques for awakening your orgasmic power, make sure to check out my Orgasmic Empowerment course for women.

 

For the next 7 days the entire course is available at a price that you choose.

 

This is my International Women’s Day gift to all the ladies on my newsletter list. Orgasmic Empowerment course normally retails at AU$297 but for the next week you can name your price! Simply email me letting me know how much you can pay for the course and I’ll provide you with an immediate access to the entire program.

Ladies, here’s to awakening and activating your full orgasmic potential!

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