I often say to my clients that penetrative sex should never, ever, ever happen unless she is wet, juicy and aroused. Because without that beautiful wetness, sex will be most likely uncomfortable or even painful for her. Which will make orgasming or even enjoying sex in the first place quite challenging.
Just think about it: forcing an erect penis into a dry vagina… Yeah, it just doesn’t sound like fun!
And I’m sure that you as a man want to be an amazing lover and that you want to give your partner the most amazing, mind-blowing sexual experiences. Not the dry, uncomfortable kind of sex but the hot, lush, exciting, pleasurable and oh-so-wet kind of sex!
So what are the best ways to get a woman wet?
Lubrication in the vagina is part of the sexual arousal process. The more aroused she gets, the more wet her pussy gets. It is, however, important to remember that women typically take more time to get aroused than men’s bodies do. Just because you as a man are ready to go, doesn’t mean that her body is the same.
This is important! If her pussy is wet, she’ll be much more likely to want to have sex with you. Simple: wet pussy means you have an aroused woman on your hands. And how delicious is that!
So what can you do to create juiciness in her vagina?
1/ How to use your words in the bedroom
Before you even get anywhere near her pussy, use your words to arouse, excite and seduce her. You can embrace her from behind, bring your lips very close to her ear and whisper something delicious: “your body is so beautiful and you turn me on so much”, “I can’t control myself around you”.
2/ Embrace the magic of kissing
Do not underestimate the magic and the power of kissing. Before you start kissing her, connect to your masculine desire, connect to your masculine essence. Really feel that desire in your body.
And when you approach her, start kissing her very softly, gently at first. Just brushing her lips with yours. Then going into more soft, wet, slow kisses. Building and building, and building until she’s ready for the more deep, more passionate kissing.
Many women I speak to find kissing absolutely essential to arousal so invest some time here into this step.
3/ Caress her entire body
Next start touching her body. Don’t go straight for her erogenous zones, actually start with her extremities first: her arms, her legs, her neck, her face, her thighs… These are all really great places to start stroking, caressing her.
Because female desire really works from the outside in. You have to work with the more external parts of her body first before she’s ready for her more primary erogenous zones (her breasts and her genitals) to be touched.
So don’t rush here! Build up the anticipation, take your time, caress her, lick her, stroke her… Really build up the pleasure and activation in her body.
4/ Hold her vulva
That very first moment when you touch her vulva is very important. Don’t go for anything too firm or too rushed. Actually what I would advise you to do is simply to cup her genital area, cup her vulva, with your hand and just hold it there, while you’re looking into her eyes or you’re kissing her.
So many women respond so well to this kind of touch. It allows them to get relaxed and to really surrender and soften into your touch and caresses.
After a few minutes of holding her pussy you can start gently moving your hand and just caressing and stroking using flat, firm pressure with your hand. Just really massaging the entire area. You can also follow that with very gentle, nice strokes all over her pussy, without targeting any particular spots at the moment. Just stroking her all over.
5/ Give her an amazing oral!
Gentlemen, oral sex is one of the top skills you should invest in if you want to be a masterful lover! Here’s a great video to help you out.
Giving her an amazing, mind-blowing, ecstatic, exciting oral sex experience is really going to help her build up that juiciness and that wetness that is so wonderful and so necessary for an amazing sex.
6/ How to tease her in bed
As you’re playing with her entire body and kissing her, and stroking her, and arousing her, make sure to tease her and to really play with that dynamic of build-up and relaxation.
This is magical! Every man and woman should know about this.
Every time you spend some time rubbing and stroking and kissing and being passionate and building up arousal in her body, follow that up with at least few moments of just slowness or even stillness, allowing her body to really integrate the pleasure and to soften into her excitement.
When you’re only building, building, building, building, you can overwhelm the body too quickly. But if you’re playing and teasing, between building and relaxing, and building and relaxing, that’s how the body gets to its most powerful depths of pleasure and orgasmic bliss.
7/ Ask her if she’s ready for more
After at least 30 minutes of this building and stroking, and caressing her, you can ask her if she’s ready for more, if she’s ready for the penetration. You can obviously also check with your finger, placing your finger at the entrance of her vagina and seeing how the wetness is going on there.
But you can also check in with her and ask her if she’s feeling ready. And even if she is, you can actually make her wait a bit longer. This is something that typically blows women’s minds because men are usually in such a rush to penetrate, to get inside, to get on with the sexual act. So for a man to say: “no, not yet, you’re not getting my cock in your pussy as yet”, that can be a tease and a beautiful surprise.
After that, you can go back to stroking her again or giving her oral sex again until she is the one begging you to get inside of her.
What if she doesn’t get wet naturally?
Sometimes what might happen is that she will feel ready and aroused but her pussy won’t be wet or it won’t be wet enough. This is normal and happens sometimes to all women, depending on their age and their health situation, whether they’ve been through menopause, and also on where they are in their monthly cycle.
So this is nothing to worry about. But in this situation you might need to apply an actual lubricant to her pussy or to your cock. So it is quite important to have a lubricant handy near your bed or wherever you’re playing, so that you can use it in situations like this.
Premature penetration issue…
Premature penetration is actually a real problem and no I’m not talking about premature ejaculation. I’m talking about premature penetration, meaning penetrating the woman too early, before she’s ready and good to go.
This is a real problem and a lot of women in my sessions mention uncomfortable or painful intercourse. And in most cases the reason is that she’s not ready yet, she’s not juicy yet, she’s not open and wet enough for you.
So instead of risking being a premature penetrator and potentially causing your love pain or discomfort (or disappointment due to no climax), embrace the 7 juicy steps and make sure to make her wet, wet, wet! I have a feeling that you’ll enjoy the process as well…
Hi! I'm Helena Nista
I help men, women, and couples experience deeper intimacy, more connected sex, and mind-blowing pleasure. Follow me on Social Media for more awesome Tantric tips, tricks, and techniques!