On one hand, I feel like there’s absolutely no need to convince anyone that they should be having orgasms. I think that we’re all more or less aware that orgasms are yum, delicious and amazing! It feels so good to approach one, to have one and to come back to Earth...
As much as you guys love blow jobs, we ladies can absolutely bliss out during state of art cunnilingus.
There is something truly magical about the combination of highly sensitive genitals and a gentle and wet touch of the tongue and mouth – it’s like they belong together!
And as is the case with anything in life – the better prepared and knowledgeable you are, the better you’ll be at performing it.
So here’s my 10 tips to give her state of art cunnilingus:
1/ Start by kissing and licking the rest of her body
Your tongue and mouth will feel amazing not only on her vulva but also on her chest, neck, ears, face, arms, hands, toes and thighs. Particularly inner arms and thighs and very sensitive and love gentle touch. Don’t forget that her genitals are not the only erogenous zone and make sure to explore the rest of her body first. This will awaken her pleasure and sensitivity, making it more likely for her to experience full-body orgasms.
Particularly her breasts will respond well to your oral loving.
2/ Slow down
If you’re in a rush to get to the “main bit”, you will subconsciously communicate a certain urgency to her body. You will make her feel like there’s a job to be done here, and hopefully quickly.
This will significantly reduce her ability to relax and surrender – and these two qualities are absolutely necessary for her to reach an orgasmic state.
In order for a woman to orgasm, the centre of her brain responsible for being in control needs to shut down. And this will not happen if she feels that you’re in a rush or that she’s taking too much time.
Remember: on average women need 4 times longer as men do to orgasm. Give her the time she needs and slooooooow dooooooown!
3/ Tease her
We all love to be teased! In sex it’s so true that it’s much more about the journey that it is about the destination. So don’t try to get her to any sort of outcome quickly. Play with her body, entice her desire, make her wait until she starts begging for more!
My partner loves teasing me by denying me his touch for those extra moments. When his face gets close to my vulva, without actually touching it, I can feel his breath on my skin and it’s driving me crazy with desire. My body starts writhing trying to satisfy the burning anticipation but he remains just out of reach until he’s ready to move closer.
4/ Use your breath
You can stimulate her with your breath, without actually touching her. You can breathe or blow on her vulva before you touch her or as a break from physical touch.
Use cool air by blowing as if you were blowing out a candle. Or open your mouth and make a ‘ha’ sound in order to blow warm air. Alternate between the two for a more stimulating effect.
5/ Open her up
Open her up – and I mean this physically. Pull her outer lips apart as you’re stimulating her with your breath or tongue.
This is extremely stimulating to a woman.
In the same way that your genitals yearn to penetrate, when she’s aroused her body craves to be open and penetrated.
6/ Watch the responses of her body
Remain attentive and watch out for any signs of discomfort or tension in her body.
Men usually tend to be too forceful and harsh with the vulva, they assume that she will enjoy the same level of pressure as their penis.
But this is not the case. Back away as soon as her body tenses up or pulls away from you.
When I saw a man masturbate for the first time in my life, I was shocked by the firm pressure he was using, I was certain that he was hurting himself!
7/ Treat her vulva as the most precious thing in the world
When touching, kissing and licking her genitals, imagine that they’re the most precious thing in the world. Be gentle, soft, loving, patient and kind.
As the woman gets more and more aroused, she’ll be asking for a bit firmer pressure, but always start with a very soft touch.
Always err on the side of caution – her intimate bits are extremely sensitive!
8/ Explore her entire vulva
Don’t start with the clitoris. Prepare the area first – lick, kiss and suck her outer lips, then her inner lips. Allow your tongue to luxuriously glide from her vaginal opening all the way up to her clitoris and then back down.
Make gentle circles around her clitoris and particularly make sure to stimulate her clitoral shaft (the internal part of the clitoris, above the external part) – this is very arousing for a woman.
Lick her introitus (vaginal opening) and then go back to stimulating the rest of her vulva plus the area surrounding it. Keep kissing her inner thighs, pubic bone and belly.
Only when she’s fairly aroused, start giving her clitoris even more attention.
Drawing the letters of the alphabet on her clit works particularly well!
9/ Use language
When you’re not certain whether she’s enjoying your touch – ask for feedback. When you’re wondering whether she’d like a different pressure – ask for feedback. Anytime you’re not certain about how to give her the most pleasure – ask for feedback!
Over time this will build up your familiarity with her body and will allow you to play her body like an instrument – building up her desire or backing away just at the right time in order to keep teasing her a little longer.
Another way to use language in bed is to talk dirty. And yes, I’m aware that you might be having a mouthful there but whenever you’re not, tell her how gorgeous and hot her pussy is and how much you’re loving her sweet taste.
10/ Enjoy yourself
And lastly, have a great time! The more you’re enjoying yourself, the more likely she’ll be to have an amazing time. Keep loving her pussy with your tongue, delight in caressing and kissing her, keep digging deeper and deeper into her pleasure.
If you’re not loving what you’re doing, it’s not likely that she will!
And if you want to learn more, check out my Legendary Lover online course!
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